Hello my Super Sexy Modern Latinas!!!
I hope everyone had a fabulous weekend! I know I did!! Well, today is Miss Manners Monday and we Super Sexy Modern Latinas do not want to be mean girls and we don't want to talk trashy. So today's etiquette lesson is on the art of appropriate speech and conversation.
But first mi'ja, I want to take it back to our cell phone ettiquete. One thing I forgot to mention, was about ring tones/ring back tones. If you are a professional, please make sure that your phone is on vibrate or on a normal ring tone in the work place. I don't think the jefe (boss) or coworkers are interested in hearing (although quite a catchy tune) Sir Mix Alot's "I like big butts and I can not lie!" Baby Got Back ring tone. No mi'ja, this is very unprofessional, save it for after work. And please, out of common courtesy, for those everyday phone calls please do not use songs with vulgarities in them. This one time your nena had to call a client and cancel an appointment, and to my shock I heard Lil Kim's "How many licks does it take to get to the center of the....." Aye mi'ja! Can we say awkward! Every time that client came in for an appointment, I thought of that song. So make sure you save your freaky deaky ring tones for the people that know you well. Okay, well back to today's lesson.
For many of us, we don't give a second thought to how we speak in front of others. But let me tell you, that the way you speak says alot about you. Especially, if it is a person's first impression about you! Aye mi'ja! This could mean the difference between getting that higher paying job and staying stuck in that same salary bracket. As for your nena, because of my profession, I've always felt held to a higher standard in the way I speak. And let me tell you, because we are a Latina minority, we are judged much more harshly. So, let's take the time to learn or review some rules of etiquette when speaking and conversing. A little disclaimer before we start: yes your nena writes in slang/Spanglish, but knowing the difference of when it is appropriate to write and speak in slang/Spanglish is also important. When I am at work I am definitely not going to refer to my boss as nena, or mi'ja. No mi'ja, I save this special fun way of talking for my closest SSMLs and for blogging. I have come up with a list of rules for speech, that I think are important for every Super Sexy Modern Latina who strives to be classy should know:
1) Do not curse in public. Sure our Angry Latina Syndrome (ALS) is going to make that difficult, especially when that super hot nena with the perky boobs peeps yo man. (If this happens you can be proud that you made him look good. And then maybe give a subtle but gentle squeeze to his nalgitas (butt) so that the other nena knows who he is going home with tonight! LOL Sha-wow-wow!!!!) All kidding aside mi'ja, we want to be seen as classy not trashy. I don't think it is Super Sexy for any woman to curse, but sometimes it just slips out, like when you smash your finger in the doorway. And please, please do not curse in front of your children. This is never okay.
2) Avoid using slang and vulgarities. Okay mi'ja, guilty as charged when using slang. Your nena has a bad habit of saying "You know what I mean?" For some nenas it is "like," or "um." This is a difficult habit to break. For some of us other nenas it might be using "Spanglish," when we speak. It is okay to use Spanglish with your familia and closest friends, but not okay to use "Spanglish," in the work place. In the workplace you want to sound educated and sophisticated, so that way you can advance in your career. Now for the vulgarities. I am not sure when it ever became okay for a nena to refer to herself or her friends as a "bitch," "hoe," or any other form of self loathing as a term of endearment. We may have to blame reality t.v. for this, but in any case it is not ever okay! It is super trashy and not what being a Super Sexy Modern Latina is all about. And it is a guaranteed way to not get you respect or that promotion you were hoping for. And be careful of what you write on your facebook mi'ja! We are strong Latina women and do ourselves and our daughters a disservice when we refer to ourselves with vulgarities. So stop doing it!
3) Speak clearly with correct grammar and pronunciation. Okay, this one may be a sensitive issue for some of our nenas from the older generation, who are first generation English speakers. My mama is a first generation English speaker and she hates the way she speaks. And I don't blame her. Remember when I told you we are judged more harshly for being Latina? This is true mi'ja. We have to speak better English than an English teacher to get respect. If you say "shursh," for "church," and use catch phrases like "she goes saying...." and speak grammatically incorrect, you may not get the respect you deserve, even if you are more qualified than that 22 year old guerita. She may have the job before you because of the way she speaks.
4) Do not speak too loudly or too softly. Okay for some of us nenas, speaking loudly is in our blood, it is who we are. But! Beware, because if you speak too loudly, you may be looked at as someone who is constantly trying to draw attention to themselves. And for "la chy (shy) girl" talking too softly will make you seem weak and insecure.
5) Speak Positively. You know that nena who is always talking about her money problems and how her man is a lazy dead beat dad, to anyone and everyone who will listen??? Yeah? Okay, well don't be that nena. Who wants to be around a nena who is always so negative? And try not to talk negatively about other people. We all do it. "Oh.... my.... gosh...., is she really wearing that crop top with her ombligo (belly button) and muffin top all hanging out of her jeans? Cochina! Sin Verguenza! At her age, she should know better!" Sound familiar mi'ja? Yup! Guilty as charged. This can make us seem petty and insecure in ourselves. I think we as nenas tend to judge ourselves and other women too harshly. So try to speak positively about others.
6) Be Friendly and speak with a bright intonation. No one likes an unfriendly and stuck up nena. So make sure you try and treat everyone with kindness. Be mindful of the intonation in your voice. Do not speak in a flat monotone voice, because that gives the message that you are bor-ring! Also make sure that your tone is not harsh and mean sounding. If your tone is harsh and mean, people are not going to want to be around you. Employers or friends.
7) Do not brag or exaggerate. One thing that your nena cannot stand is when someone brags about what they have or how much money they make. If it really makes you feel better about yourself to brag, then keep on bragging, because pretty soon you'll be bragging to yourself. Sure we all brag sometimes, about our kids, pets, husbands. But doing it constantly is not super sexy. No one likes a show off, nena.
8) Don't break your hand patting yourself on the back. This one is hard, because we are all proud of our accomplishments. And don't get me wrong mi'ja, we should be proud of our accomplishments, but let's use a little modesty when doing so.
9) When someone is rude to you, don't dust off that CLS (Crazy Latina Syndrome).
When someone is rude to our face, our natural inclination is to curse them out and our CLS comes out. But remember, we are going for classy not trashy. So it is best to hold your head up high and walk away. In the end, who is the one that's going to look trashy in front of others if you walk away? You? Or the person who was rude to you? This ones hard, but bite your tongue girl! Plus getting in a cat fight and ending up in jail is never super sexy.
10) Greet others with a smile, say please and thank you. For your nena, it is just common courtesy to greet others. Not doing so makes you seem standoffish and snobby. When I say "greet others", I am talking about in the workplace and other public places. But use common sense mi'ja, you're not going to greet a stranger at night while walking back to your car from the mall. Always remember to say please and thank you.
So there you have it my Super Sexy Modern Latinas! My top 10 list of how to speak with class! I know we are not perfect, but what is our motto? To make ourselves and our familias better! Que no? So try and practice these rules as often as you can.
Besitos! ;)
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